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I really do think words matter.\u00a0 And how we use them can oftentimes hinder or help in the creation of the kind of world and the kind of life we\u2019re striving for.<\/p>\nI really do think words matter.\u00a0 And how we use them can oftentimes hinder or help in the creation of the kind of world and the kind of life we\u2019re striving for.<\/p>\n
Take for example the words grow<\/em> and build<\/em>.\u00a0 To build something is to put things together in a logical order.\u00a0 if you build a house you have a foundation, walls, supports for the roof, the roof itself, and the covering.\u00a0 Once the walls are up, windows go in, doors are hung, everything is orderly, and it\u2019s done in a linear process.<\/p>\n We\u2019ve gotten so good at building things in this country that we\u2019ve created factories where we mass-produce things on a conveyor belt by engineering the process and simply working the process over time.<\/p>\n While this may be good for houses and widgets, building as a way of thinking about relationships almost always breaks down. <\/em><\/strong> For example, trying to build a great marriage is frustrating because people are not things and they don\u2019t stay as they are.\u00a0 They can get better, they can get worse, they can grow, or they can stagnate.<\/p>\n When it comes to relationships, the best way to think about how to build good ones is to grow<\/em> them.<\/strong> Good soil, cultivation, feeding, nurturing, sunshine, time, weeding out: all of these are the tools of a grower.\u00a0 To grow a great marriage over time takes good soil, sunshine, weeding.\u00a0 It takes attention.\u00a0 There you go!\u00a0 That\u2019s the difference, isn\u2019t it?\u00a0 To grow a thing requires constant attention.<\/strong> To build a thing is to build it and leave it sit.\u00a0 Look at how many cars you see sitting out in front of homes that were built but are now rusting, up on blocks, and long outlived their usefulness.<\/p>\n Beside that same house you\u2019ll see a garden, beautifully planted all in rows, tilled and attended to with love.\u00a0 The very best way for me to grow my marriage is to help my wife grow<\/strong>, to be a good lover to her; which means to serve her and help her to realize her full, God-given potential in every area of her life.<\/p>\n Maybe our problem is we\u2019re trying to build what we should be growing.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" I really do think words matter.\u00a0 And how we use them can oftentimes hinder or help in the creation of the kind of world and the kind of life we\u2019re striving for. Take for example the words grow and build.\u00a0 To build something is to put things together in a logical order.\u00a0 if you build … Continue reading “Why Trying to Build a Great Marriage is So Frustrating”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[],"series":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.davidfoster.tv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1850"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.davidfoster.tv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.davidfoster.tv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.davidfoster.tv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.davidfoster.tv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1850"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.davidfoster.tv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1850\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.davidfoster.tv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1850"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.davidfoster.tv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1850"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.davidfoster.tv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1850"},{"taxonomy":"series","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.davidfoster.tv\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/series?post=1850"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}